Will always be.
Often we find ourselves fighting and fighting for the things/people that we want the most - that in our head, are the best and the only choice that we have. And more often than not we don't take a step back and view it all in a bigger picture because we just want to fulfil that need to get what we think we deserve.
I used to be a lot like that. I would want what I want and fight for it all the way, no giving in. I always had my way as a kid and grew up thinking that I was always entitled to that. But I've realised, over the course of the past year especially, that it's good that things don't go our way sometimes. And that people always come into your life for a reason. Some to teach you something, some to just enjoy a moment with, some to love you and make you happy.. and some to hurt you. You need to have downs in your life to experience the ups, too. People are never bad people nor good people, we're all the same, it's just how much of the bad thoughts or good thoughts we choose to act upon that make us who we are. I'm no angel nor devil, nobody is.
A year ago I didn't understand friendship nor cherish it, nor did I see how toxic some of the relationships with people I had were. A year ago I didn't know I had been cheated on, but a year later when I found out, I wasn't angry at all. Just thought of it as good timing for I would never have been able to trust again had it happen at a different time. Taking for granted the ones who really did understand and love me, and spending all my time with the people who were nice to me in front of me, but not so nice when I wasn't around... I'm so thankful I see it all better now and I spend my time doing things with meaningful people even if it's a non meaningful activity.
Everything happens for a reason and it's sometimes very hard to accept it when it hurts that much, but the day you see why it had to happen will be the day you learn to let go. Holding on to something can be a sign of strength, but so is letting go. Sometimes there's just no need to 'stand up and prove yourself' to anyone. All you gotta do is prove to yourself that you can choose to make better choices, to be better than you were yesterday.
Maybe you're going through a bad time, and I know it sucks. I've been there. Just hold on a lil longer, and you'll see why it had to happen.