Have Courage, Be Kind

June 25, 2015

Heard about something today that really affected me - in a bad way - and writing always makes me feel better, so here I am.

Everything written is my personal opinion and I am in no way challenging anyone or anything, and I know that everyone is entitled to their own opinion.
I just have all these questions.. And even more sincerely, I'm hoping for a more accepting Singapore. 

Woke up to news trending on social media that a boy named Aloysius, a 16 year old student here in Singapore, committed suicide two days ago in his home.
He was obviously depressed, judging from his IG/Twitter postings... You can easily find them online.

If you're wondering why he was bullied, it was because he 'different'. 
What made him 'different'? 
He was gay.

Shortly after reading all the heartbreaking stories and reports on his death, I saw another article on Facebook about what our PM Lee said about same sex marriage in Singapore. That our society is a conservative one, and thus, we are not ready.

I will admit that I was a little angry after reading it, so I felt the need to write my thoughts down and share the article. Here is what I wrote :

*Just feel like ranting a little so skip this post if you're not interested in hearing it. *
There'll always be different views on this, but mine will always be the same :

Some of us are just born different and who is to say what is right or wrong?
If we fight for equality in this country then why are we unable to accept diversity in how some of us are just born to love people of the same sex? Why aren't they entitled to what we are all entitled to?

A few of the most important values I've been taught about life : To be responsible for one's actions and live with a conscience.. Not to hurt anyone and spread kindness and love whenever possible.

None of that sounds like discrimination against people who are simply made different. It is undeniable that the LGBT community has been bullied for years and years - To submission, and secrecy.
Isn't it already 2015? Is it still not time yet to stop the bullying and treat everyone with acceptance and love? When will it finally be the right time...?

I find it so sad. That two of the best humans I know, who have one of the most loving and giving relationships I've ever witnessed for myself, are not able to have each other in marriage just because society says so.


Do you see the connection like I do?

If society is conservative, then why not educate the society? Is there truly no need for our children, from the time they have any sex education, to learn about same sex relationships as well? That some of their classmates, schoolmates or friends are very simply born different?
Maybe only then will people understand and stop the judging, the shaming, the bullying.

Do you really think being gay is a CHOICE?
We're talking science here : Did you know that there are animals out there, like lions, chimpanzees and dolphins that have been spotted engaging in same sex pairings? So are these animals, like us, CHOOSING to be gay? 

You can read a full article HERE on how, and I quote, that no specific 'gay genes' have been found by scientists, but there ARE genes on the X chromosome and chromosome 8 to be found in higher prevalence in men who are gay.

Honestly, I just wish for a better world where all of us can accept each other for whoever we really are. For a world where we can truly celebrate love, in whatever form it comes in.  
For a world where I can see some of my closest friends being able to show affection/love towards each other wherever we may be, without being judged, as much as I am. Not afraid anymore of doing something as simple as holding hands. 

To all the people who keep fighting and fighting against love in our LGBT community : Why are you fighting against something that should be celebrated?
If people from LGBT community don't go around spreading hate on how we are straight, why is it being done the other way round?

I usually don't blog about such issues but I can't help it.
I have quite a few close friends who are gay and they literally are the kindest, most sincere people I know who accept others in every way. Unicorns in this harsh world. I hate that people are judgemental enough for them to feel unable to express affection in public.

On a personal level, I know the feeling of being bullied for things out of your control : I used to have very bad skin in secondary school... I had huge zits and my skin was crazy oily thanks to puberty/genes, and I was laughed at for it.

Do you think it was by choice?
Do you really think Aloysius, like so many others, choose to be gay?

Aloysius had a whole life ahead of him, but the lack of understanding and support have driven him to take what he felt was the only way out. I can only pray that he'll be the last, but I know deep down that there are only going to be more of such tragedies happening, if the rest of us don't step up and accept that all of us are only human, no matter who we love. Stop the bullying.


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